January 2008
There are some serious young criminals out there. Kids who sell drugs. Teens that kill their parents. Junior high school students planning the next Columbine. And of course, the biggest menace of all … 13-year-old French fry chucker’s.

In yet another display of the justice system intruding into public schools in the most ridiculous ways, police in Laramie, Wyoming charged three 13-year-old Laramie High School students for “hurling missiles” under a city ordinance intended to prevent the inciting of riots. The girls allegedly threw French fries during lunchtime at the school in January.

Their excuse? Word of a ‘food fight’ reached school officials the day before, who warned the students not to do it. They wanted to send a message to the students that there would be consequences. Hmmm…13-year-olds rebelling against authority. Where in the world have I seen this before?

Police Chief Bob Deutsch said that “they saw it as really the planning of a riot, when you think about it.” Really? Ok, thinking … thinking … thought about it. Nope, it looks more like childhood shenanigans to us. It sounds a lot like Laramie school officials unable to handle school-related incidents.

So beware kids: No food fights. And we mean it. Word has it these girls have been added to the FBI’s terrorist watch list. Their phones are being tapped as we speak.